Fearing Failure is a Choice!

Have the courage to fail big and stick around.
Make them wonder why you’re still laughing!
~ From the film Elizabethtown

There is a lot of wisdom in that statement.  It isn’t so much that you want to prove to others that you’re strong in the face of adversity but rather, to me, it portrays an individual who understands that fearing failure is only a result of caring about the opinions of onlookers. In the vast configuration of things that really matter, what those people might think have nothing to do with your actual experience.

Children are inherently good at moving past failures because, in their youthful pursuit of life experiences, they have no idea what failure means. Like everything, children are taught that fearing failure is “normal” by some well-intentioned adult who explains the mechanics of failure and success.

Strictly speaking and in my opinion, you can only fail if you are comparing yourself to external standards that may or may not apply.  Yes, this sounds a bit like double speak but please bear with me while I explain.

When we measure our success against another person’s accomplishments and find ourselves falling short of that mark, we are doing ourselves a disservice.  What worked for them in their environment may have no bearing on what will work for you.  Have you ever noticed the small print in advertisements and sales copy that informs us that results are not typical?

Don't let Fear of Failure Stop You!

I don’t mean to imply that you shouldn’t surround yourself with people whom you admire and pursue the level of success apparent in their lifestyle.  That is the premise of working with a mentor, after all.  They have traveled the road that you wish to undertake and, if they are charging fees for mentoring, they have *hopefully* learned something about the route that they can teach you.  But, if you cannot immediately mirror that level of success, please don’t let it slow you down or stop you!

In my mind’s eye, any effort to do something that one has never done before cannot ever be considered a failure.  Fearing failure has potential to stifle your creativity as you imagine ways to proceed with your plans. If things do not turn out as expected, that is not a failure either.  Remember, goals are only intended to measure progress.  If you have to regroup or reset your goals, that is NOT a failure.

Who says you have to have it all together by a certain age? In my early 50s, I threw away the success model my parents prescribed and started all over again because I discovered that what was true for them was not bearing out to be true for me.  You can read how to avoid fearing failure here.

Fail Forward, Fast
~Tom Peters

I can’t help finding analogies in the behavior of children when I think of this topic.  Children pick themselves up from a fall and keep moving after their goal.  If something hurts, they eventually learn to avoid it.  The same is true for our businesses.  Inexperience might cause a painful lesson or two along the way to your own definition of success but fearing failure can stop you from trying something new. It’s all about your attitude.

This is a link to a story about an 11-year old who understood the iterative process of succeeding. It is a pretty awesome video example.

In the video below, Brian Tracy gives some great advice for overcoming the fears that may be holding you back in your progress.

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One’s mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.

Not only is this synchronous, it also is quite profound in its simple truth. Once we are introduced to a something new, and the idea takes root in our minds and inspires us, it is virtually impossible to operate as we did before we made our important discovery. Our eager minds pursue the idea and follow it through permutations and twists in the road. Through every turn, the core substance of the idea remains solid and the starting point to which you always will return, should you find a need to adjust your strategy.

Take Internet Marketing, for example. A few years ago, I decided that I would get income through online means. In pursuit of that vision, I began subscribing to newsletters and purchasing products that would teach me more about what people were doing online. Some of the methods that I evaluated are not ones that I use or would recommend but knowing what not to do is almost as important as knowing what to do, isn’t it? Due to my interest and attention, I am able to spot trends and, when it comes to opportunity offers, I have a pretty good system for separating the wheat from the chaff.

As I put my own business plan into motion, it became obvious that my time spent learning about internet marketing was extremely helpful to people who retained my services for Online Branding and wanted to get income online. Although my primary source of income is still from my consulting services, the fact that I am personally involved with my customers doesn’t imply that I am not an internet marketer. I source all of my business through Web 2.0 methods and enjoy working with people.  And, the best part is that my business is totally portable!

My mind was stretched by this self-induced learning. When I approach a potential business liaison or client, it is nearly impossible for me to talk merely about traditional means of sourcing new business. When I set up ecommerce websites, for instance, I make recommendations beyond layout, technology, and graphics. My degree is in business and that knowledge, coupled with the education I’ve received through personal learning, are assets to any project that I undertake and I’ve heard this repeatedly from my customers.

All things being equal, anyone who has a business website is an internet marketer. Here is the caveat; The prettiest site in the world cannot manufacture new business and cash flow. If you haven’t done so already, it would serve you well to either learn about, or retain the services of someone who knows about techniques that will improve your website’s visibility through Web 2.0 techniques that drive targeted traffic, as well as performing the time-consuming SEO methods that will get it listed and ranked by search engines. If you are in business and have no website, you are missing an incredible opportunity. Personally, I feel that it is sheer folly to be in business without a website. It is statistically proven that people look online prior to making any purchase decision.

Even though this is not business related, our minds can also be stretched by ideas that present themselves in everyday life. The ingenuity of a child who is working out a difficult “engineering” problem related to the sand castle they are building at the beach is a good example. It is not an unimportant side note to remind you to take time to relax your mind so as to re-charge your creative juices.  If we are fortunate, we retain our sense of awe about things that are remarkable and have nothing to do with making money, like watching swallows soaring high above us or witnessing the oceans that undulate through forces unseen. At times when you need to restore yourself, it is good to have easy access to those things that opened your mind as a child.

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This video was awesome to me for several reasons.  In a moment of epiphany, I posted it to Public Skype Chat with my thoughts about how viral this sort of video could be if properly used in a marketing campaign.  A member of the group, who was similarly intrigued after doing some of her own research, asked me how I found myself using this sort of media to promote my business.

What is seemingly off-topic from business but is also cute or funny can be used to leverage your primary business, if it is done right.  Internet and Affiliate marketers have been using this tactic for years by employing misspelled or extremely similar domain names and keywords which leverage high volume searches on the internet.  If you would like to know what is hot on the internet in real time, I recommend checking out Google Trends.

From a consumer point of view, if we think of the things that attract us in marketing, we all know there are several.  Babies and animals may be at the top of the list.  They have a way of making most people feel comfortable or empathize with the marketing message.  Of course, some marketers still use sex in every advertisement, especially automobile companies and alcohol distributors.  Regardless of the psychological tool employed, humor is a wonderful way to capture and hold a prospect’s attention at your website.

The simple truth is, whether online or offline, there are certain things that resonate with consumers or business opportunity prospects and trigger their responses.  Traditional marketing understands and leverages this knowledge.  Market testing is not a luxury phase for any product launch.  If your product is digital, don’t overlook the power of Google Analytics while you are tweaking your sites.

If you have a perceived urgency to generate income or a limited budget, as a consumer of products and services, you know what works best when you stop and think about it.  Walk around to the other side of your virtual cash register and view things from that perspective.  Once you adapt your thinking to that point of view, your marketing message and techniques become obvious.  You must capture the attention of your target market and hold it without trying to sell them anything. 

This may sound counter intuitive but, if you think of your own reactions to sales, I know that you know that it isn’t.  Even if you are on a showroom floor, how do you feel when a sales person interrupts your train of thought while you are considering your choices?  Do you like being told the differences or would you rather quietly compare the features and functions of the product to the things on your wish list?  It may not be possible to create one message for both audiences but it is possible to put up two different sites with two different messages and find out which works best.     

Although few people understand this, a good marketer leads a person to understand what they want.  Did you catch the most important word in that last sentence?  A good marketer is a leader, not a sales person.  Internet marketing is much more than formulaic sales, OTOs and pop-up offers.  People have written volumes about website design but none that I’ve read have discussed the psychology of marketing or how to really use it online.  

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